Brie or Bigod? It’s not too late to order your Christmas cheese!
I'm going shopping for mine today...no cranberry-studded abominations allowed...Read on for where to buy, what to buy, how much to spend and what to drink with cheese (incl 'spare Stilton' shame)
I’ve devoted today to going shopping for cheese (after going to the farm shop because they’ve brought their rescue reindeer and donkeys out for everyone to pet).
***But it’s not too late to order online if you’re really desperate!!***
My husband says other people don’t remember the events of their lives in terms of what was being eaten, as I do. But I could get more specific and whittle that down to remembering my life by the major cheese events I consider life-changing.
I’ll almost definitely remember my child’s life by the cheeses she eats. She’s just moved on from her Parmesan phase to her Camembert phase. Initially, I suggested half a small wheel a day should be her limit, from a cost perspective, but actually supermarket Camembert is much cheaper than any other snack and it’s just milk. So for the past month or so, she’s eaten it about three times a day.
I’ve even developed a cheese game. Baron or Brie!
NB: I’m going to litter this post with images of some of my favourite cheeses, as I don’t have time to mention all of them.
Where to buy
Last night, Neal’s Yard Dairy, revealed it has a few slots left. Londoners can order by midday today (saturday). Everyone else by tomorrow (Sunday) before midday.
The OG Neal’s Yard Dairy is one of my all-time favourite cheesemongers, and one of those we have to thanks for supporting and developing the British cheese industry into what it is today, by supporting the small farmhouse producers. Their cheese is more expensive than the same kind you might find in a supermarket, but they hand select the best and mature it themselves, so it’s not the same product vacuum-packed at the bigger retailers.
My other favourites have closed Christmas deliveries, but there’s still time to buy for New Year or buy someone a present - the present I believe is the all-time best gift for anyone who isn’t vegan - a cheese voucher or subscription.
Paxton & Whitfield hosts regular tasting evenings, where they send you a bunch of cheese and you can log on to hear their experts telling you about what you’re eating. The moment you attend one of these events, you begin to realise the work that goes into producing cheese, why it’s such a beautiful and important part of our fragile food system, and why you need to DISCOVER AND EAT EVEN MORE CHEESE.
The arbiters of good taste advise restraint and not buying lots of small pieces of cheese for a centrepiece cheeseboard at any time of year. But if everyone’s into it, it allows for a bit more cheese chat.
We did a great one on French Classics at the end of the Paris Olympics this summer that introduced me to a tangy patty of Mothais-sur-feuille, and we’ll be friends for life. It comes wrapped in a chestnut leave so is very festive - individual cheeses like this make great gifts.
The Courtyard Dairy in North Yorkshire sets a standard for the industry, having reinvigorated the local farmhouse cheese community. It supports many young new makers and educates and entertains everyone who visits whether over a chat while they buy or in the fun cheese museum.
I hadn’t really tried Farmhouse Wensleydale before visiting, and now it’s a favourite. Look for Yoredale and Fellstone.
If you don’t live anywhere near, it’s well worth planning a holiday around a visit to The Courtyard Dairy. It has a wonderful wine shop, Buon Vino and a pizza place, Rind, from the English/British cheese folk who do The Cheese Bar and Barge in London. It’s near Settle and Giggleswick in the middle of the Yorkshire Dales, but only an hour and a bit north of Leeds. I know I have a lot of American readers (hope you’re not too triggered by the lack of Oxford commas in my newsletters) and tourists make time for Scotland, the Lakes and the Cotswolds, but Yorkshire is the most beautiful place in the world.
I have always had great success ordering from The Cheese Society, though I have never been to the Lincoln shop and café. I’ve found cheeses there that I haven’t seen elsewhere, and the Taste of Lincolnshire box is a great gift.
ALL the supermarkets now do great cheeses, in terms of choice and quality. You can make a great cheese centrepiece for £10-£15 from Aldi or Asda. There are things like Sainsbury’s Chaource (£2.36/£3.55), which is really creamy and a definite ‘event’ cheese for a great price.
What to buy
Buy three or four cheeses to make a good-looking cheeseboard.
It is worth buying one or two kinds of decent crackers and chutneys. Decent oatcakes and something crispy from Peter’s Yard. A clean jelly as well as a chunky chutney. Though I often eat cheese without either. Is that r$wdo**ing a cheeseboard? Have I just found the first ever word to make me blush? FFS.
It’s nice to buy the biggest pieces you can afford, but I know that could mean anything.
You can make a very pretty cheeseboard with small pieces and lots of crackers, fruit, chutneys and jellies. You might want to buy one big cheese, such as a Stilton or soft cheese, to display and bring out after a particular meal.
I say ‘after’ a meal. As I understand it, French people and posh people have cheese before dessert. I do like and understand the concept, but we’ve always had it at the end of the meal. I think this works better socially, as more adults seem to enjoy gorging on cheese over sweet stuff, and linger over interesting drinks, reach for an after dinner mint or delicious Italian biscuit…you can swamp your table in sweet bites at the same time as bringing the cheese out, too.
The failsafe approach is a mix of a hard cheese, a soft cheese, a blue cheese and something else - perhaps a dinky goat’s cheese.
You might want to go classic with a Stilton, Camembert or Brie, a Cheddar or Lancashire, and a little French goat’s cheese.
But if you eat these kinds of cheeses all year round, Christmas can be the time to push the boat out. I love classic cheeses but innovation in the industry is at a high right now and it’s hard not to try and buy new things.
After years spent developing a strong UK cheese industry based on reinvigorating farmhouse cheeses and making UK versions of French favourites, producers are now pushing boundaries to make new exciting cheeses in terms of age, texture and flavour - but these are grown up cheeses, NOT novelty abominations.
Paxton’s, for example, has a Dovedale blue drenched in PX and a hard goat’s coated in coffee grinds, called Kaldi.
If you want to go with British cheeses but feel French cheese is superior - it’s not and there’s always a British alternative for any popular French cheese, because we’ve copied their methods!
I have written about why we love Cheddar so much here, but though I always have some in for sandwiches, I won’t focus on it over Christmas. My hard cheese dreams veer between classic love of Mrs Kirkham’s Lancashire and Appleby’s Cheshire, and trying out new (and old) Alpine styles - Gruyere and Comté are the obvious ones. If you haven’t tried these, buy some!! Etivaz is stunning. The UK is perhaps a little behind in this style of cheee, being without the Alps, but Summer Field is really good.
But then again…if you adore Cheddar, why not try a new one such as Pitchfork, Hafod or Westcombe, and make that your Christmas cheese adventure?
Right now, I’m thinking I’ll go Stichelton, Baron, something Alpine, Appleby’s Cheshire (don’t worry I have some Kirkham’s in the freezer) and a cute soft round of something tangy, possible with an ashy coating.
But anything could happen - it’s a 40-minute drive to the cheese shop.
How much to spend
A few weeks’ ago, I spoke to the very knowledgeable Emma Young, , consultant and author of The Cheese Wheel (Ebury, £14.99), for a feature on how or why we spend as we do on each aspect of our Christmas Day feast. This piece covered affordability and ethics, which are so often at loggerheads.
Emma recommended spending £25 - £50 or a really stunning selection.
“I think a healthy way of looking at Christmas cheese is to make sure you are purchasing cheeses which you like, not just for the sake of it,” she told me.
“I’d be happy with a Mont D’Or – a gooey, spoonable cheese – and a large wedge of Stilton or Stichelton, which would sit me at around the £25 mark and comfortably feed four if their cheese appetites aren’t as insatiable as my own.”
She pointed out that the prices go up depending on the labour that goes into a cheese, so actually you’ll get a far better quality Cheddar than a goat’s cheese for your money.
Go big or go home
But I do think Christmas is the correct moment to gild the lily. My dream this year was a giant truffled baron, and I’ve discovered a budget option at Sainsbury’s so I’m giving that a go, for research purposes.
We have some really brilliant cheese in Kent. Cheesemaker’s of Canterbury cover all the major styles. I love their Bowyer brie in particular, the soft and sharp Ellie’s is the best in salads with wintry leaves, nuts and roots, and Ashmore. But they’re always innovating.
The abominations
Look, I know they do this for attention, but the vile flavoured shit that people put out is getting more and more ridiculous. This year, thinking we’d moved away from cranberry-studded anaemic stuff, I discovered Aldi peddling a maple cheesecake flavoured cheese.
There are lots of protections in the cheese world, and rightly so. If you feel you need protection from an Auntie who has served you a maple syrup cheesecake flavoured cheese this year, do not hesitate to get in touch.
What to drink
For some reason, heavy reds got a reputation as the thing to drink with cheese. But when I was told that Champagne or interesting whites (eg from Jura) were better for matching up to the cheese in terms of effervesence or flavour, without smothering them in tannins, my wine and cheese game entered new territory.
Langres is a pretty little cheese with a divot in the top, designed for pouring Champagne over.
On the red side, I go for something lighter and livelier now. More on this another time.
The spare Stiltons
You’re not supposed to admit to being trolled on the ‘Overheard in Waitrose’ site, launched to take the piss out of idiots like me who spend every penny they have on food.
But one year someone posted they’d heard someone talking loudly on the phone about picking up a ‘spare Stilton’. Listen, I can’t say that poster overheard me on the phone, but I do know that I was asked by another family member to pick up a ‘spare Stilton’.
The less embarrassing news? This Stilton went into the freezer. We didn’t eat two whole cheeses, but yes, we were in the grip of a premeditated cheese shortage fear.
The great news: you can cook or freeze ‘spare’ cheese.
Happily, I have since found a way to overcome this fear. And that is by eating cheese all year round.
Tell me about your festive cheese shopping? Your curd-soaked dreams? Your unpasteurised festishes?
Do you do some cheese-focused meals? Is anyone planning a fondue?
Don’t forget to buy more cheese in January!
Have a wonderful Christmas, whatever and wherever you are.
Sophie XX
Love the Brie or Bigod idea! We have our own made medlar jelly, so we’re going Bigod.
Love this a lot! All the cheese please Sophie. Merry Christmas to you xx